Errors I cannot abide!

-1x-1Mad Max: Fury Road combines a whole bunch of my favorite things and I am geeking out on three or four different levels about it this week.

But at the forefront of it all, it’s the cars.

There aren’t a lot of cars in sci-fi, as a rule, which is a shame.  So usually, all of my technerd friends will wax ecstatic about the spaceships, the weapons, the aircraft, and I can’t really join in because I don’t know much about them.  Cars are my thing, but usually the only cinematic opportunity I have to geek out on them large-scale is provided by movies like the Fast And Furious franchise, which only has a nodding acquaintance with the laws of physics and is thus disappointing to get into.

Plus, the cars are so frequently chosen for eyecandy value and nothing more.

But Fury Road’s massive fleet of post-apocalyptic warwagons is different.  These cars are special and unique, and while they look amazing, they were also designed with specific tasks in mind!  The vehicles are all real, working cars, they fit the landscape, and they’ve been designed to serve as extensions of the characters who drive them!  The designers even actually scavenged a lot of them from junkyards, to construct ‘em.  Holy crap, sci-fi cars that stand up to analysis? Sign me up!

-1x-1 (1)And as I scour the Internet for information about them, in most cases helpfully provided by the filmmakers, I run into other write-ups.  And they’re not very well-done…and…you know…

So, I don’t rant a lot, but I’m going to, now.  No!  This is not a rant.  This is a polite correction (and possibly an admonishment to refrain from regurgitating stuff from the press release if you aren’t sure what you’re talking about).  This is to stop these thoughts from bouncing around in my head, dammit.

So, listen up, Bloomberg News!  :

  1. The Gigahorse doesn’t have two V16 engines, it has two V8s, for a total of 16 cylinders.
  2. I don’t know what a “steel coil V8 engine” is. I can’t even figure out what was mistranslated here.
  3. I’m not correcting grammar, either. Though I could. This is just about the cars.
  4. “Four feet of suspension” makes no sense. A 48” suspension lift is what’s happening here, the better to fit those maaaassive tires.  Speaking of which, when I saw early snapshots of the vehicles from Fury Road, and saw the monster truck, I rolled my eyes, thinking, “well, that’s a useless bit of eye candy.  What point is it going to serve?”  And it actually serves a purpose.  Well played, Fury Road.
  5. A military supertanker is a boat, isn’t it? I don’t know why one would have axles or tires.
  6. What on earth are “supercharged weaponized caltrops?”
  7. Royal Enfield, not Royal Einfeld. Oh, wait, that’s grammar, technically. Sorry.
  8. Specifically, a Holden EH wagon. Also an explanation of the plows would be handy; they are thrown to the ground after the car has harpooned a larger vehicle to create drag and slow it down.

Okay, that’s eight things.  Also, I feel better. So much work went into these vehicles, even the ones that lived only to be wrecked, that I just wanted to try and do them justice.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go see the movie again.  Then we’ll talk good things about Fury Road‘s cars, how does that sound?icmujd